i dreamt i got LH and CE pregnant a few weeks apart from each other… CE’s name was “cheryl” tho… and she looked like meg ryan sometimes…

i found this out at some candle-lit event… like… a cocktail hour with a power outage… everyone was standing.. idle… social.. familiar.. LH wore glasses.. everyone was so professional… she told me she couldn’t “do anything” until we did… meaning somehow that my child with CH would effect her planning her child… I didn’t understand… then CE explained to me that she was pregnant too…
(asynchronous) i had to get my car from the junk yard in the woods… there was an anchor woman there.. she was aging… she needed a ride… the black yard attendant was leisurely arguing with her and told me not to help her.. she had to learn a lesson… i made like i was going to give her a ride… i wasnt certain i wouldnt yet… and said i wasnt even sure if my car would start after so long… i got in.. and locked it up.. she tried to get in.. it was already running.. i took off… i felt like i had done the right thing because she was his woman/his to deal with/his customer… and he knew what he was doing… altho i felt a little guilty…. but i didnt kno either of them and thought it best not to involve myself.. maybe she WAS trying to scam someone… any judgement wasn’t my call to make..

at home i was back in time… i had the opportunity to not get “cheryl” pregnant… we were newly weds of some sort… our home was fairly grand (spacious.. nice molding.. metropolitan.. historic) and barren… i was an inventor or something.. .i knew that i had a short amount of time to bring my inventions to fruition before the ladies would have my babies… “9 months” i thought…. “no… 6… no… 3 months… I have 3 months to establish myself and get to the point of living my dream career as an inventor and being able to afford all these kids” i took xmas lights out of a box and they were connected to/in a network.. and i strung them around the room… partially on the tree… and mostly on the computer… the display wasn’t a display… it was part of my creation.. but as a display it looked like weakness… there was no symmetry… everything was slight and saggy… it looked careless and ignorant..

she criticized me for putting up xmas lights in september… i told her… xmas IS coming…. trying to hide the absurdity.. knowing she wouldn’t understand the invention.. and knowing that i would never bring it to fruition in time to afford all my kids… she wasn’t pregnant yet… this was back in time.. this was to be my redemption… everything was beige… this was my chance not have another kid… we began to fuck on some boxes… i HAD TO repeat the drama… and set the failure.. because caution would be an admission that i didnt believe in my inventions… i had to go “all in”… this WAS my redemption.. the living room had a window in it to a control room like a studio of some sort… the studio was occupied but the people weren’t people… they weren’t present… “cheryl” was some sort of professional woman.. in a business skirt… which i lifted… penetration felt so good I woke up