August 31, 2006

infomecial evangelism… why not?

(i kno i had a similar idea once… was this is?)

but yeah… say… a cheese grater… for forgiveness

i can rub a cheese grater against my face the wrong way… and be fine… i could rub it the other way.. and grate the skin off my face…

forgiveness is like this…

when u look back over time to the actions of people in your life… you see things through the filter of the causal chain AFTER the deeds…

if u look with timeless objectivity… from BEFORE the deeds… and give… freely.. what was taken… you Fore-Give… and claim that the deeds were ok… because.. it was not theft… but a thing freely given…

that’s forgiveness

you have to look at things from the right direction… or you’ll get your face cut

buy this cheese grater for a friend.. it’ll remind them of Jesus…

right?????

so why not a whole series of things like this?

all sorts of late night ron popeel products… with lil sermons in em…

“ur gonna fill ur home with crap anyway.. .why not let that crap remind you of the teachings of the lord??”

reality show:
different religions.. or just Christian denominations live together and try to evangelize each other…

how about

product placement in evangelical ads?

“david… drink Gatorade… and pray… no fear”

“daily word brought to you by coke”

these are vehicles… is that bad?

if it is bad…

is that bad??

i feel like… sometimes the most evil stuff.. and the most holy stuff… are the same…

what could be more evil than to scourge and crucify the son of god?

he seemed like a nice guy…

that’s evil as hell…

but what a holy occasion…

im serious

(this has not been proofread for sense or grammar…)

Myspace.com
Thomas G Henry’s Somewhat Ridiculous B’day Party

Posted By:
The Townhouse

Hosted By:
Thomas G Henry
e-mail

When:
Saturday Jul 08, 2006
at 8:00 PM

Where:
TheTownHouze
msg me for directions myspace.com/thomasghenry
poughkeepsie, NY 12601
US
View Map

a keg… a salad bar… a kissing booth… … …and I will abso-fucking-lutely cry if I want to.
Your RSVP:
Attending

 

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function DropDownSelect(obj, val) { var i; var len = obj.options.length; for (i=0; i

SPREAD THE WORD…
Hiya!!I turn “the big two five” on Saturday and I want you to come and be drunk in my home with me.There will be no door prizes.
There may or may not be a salad bar.
There may or may not be a keg.

Do NOT bring me gifts… I have “a thing” about gifts. I will burn them without hesitation still in their wrapping… (unless it’s a living, unharmed fire fly)

There will however be a “Kissing Booth”.

I will be charging $1/minute of making out with……… Me.

Why? Because it’s that kinda “somewhat ridiculous birthday party”. If you’ve ever been curious about the leathery chops on this grimey mug… this will be your opportunity to “make all your wildest dreams come true.”

Making out with with me for a minute at a time is fun, safe, and you might just learn something*.

Persons in relationships must show proof of permission from their significant others. This can be a signed permission slip from him/her or a waiver from you that he/she will not know, and or care, and or try to “get” me, and or wreck my stuff as a result of your actions in, around, or pertaining to the kissing booth.

I may or may not donate every dollar to something meaningful.

I will also accept living, unharmed fireflies as currency.

Proof of a complete recent negative STD test enters you into the orgy raffle. KIDDING……………………………………………………………………………………

But I spose if u wanna pay each other a dollar to make out without me that’s fine too. Maybe if a significant amount of money gets raised I’ll actually donate it to something… suggestions?

Usual Townhouse rules apply… call or write for directions (845.22.88.555, thomasghenry@gmail.com, myspace.com/thomasghenry )… smoking out back… quiet out front… park in guest spaces only… BYOB encouraged but not mandated… nudity mandated but not encouraged… crashing is welcome but you may or may not wake up being spooned by me or Rob, or you may or may not have to share a futon with 17 children… dont drive drunk.. u may or may not get all burned up like that chick in the bulliten…

I hope my vanity is equal parts digusting and fun. I am actually very fragile and lonely. I’m scared no one will come to my birthday party. I’m scared that no one will ever kiss me again… because it’s so expensive… cuz of the gas prices.

MOST IMPORTANTLY (even more important than not drunk driving) PLEASE WEAR A FESTIVE HAT%%%%%%

*(You may or may not actually learn anything.)

[18052006 02:19:49] Tarsorrhaphix: white house
[18052006 02:20:07] Tarsorrhaphix: anne frank house
[18052006 02:20:08] LucidFluid2: blackhaus
[18052006 02:20:12] Tarsorrhaphix: bauhouse
[18052006 02:20:14] LucidFluid2: light house
[18052006 02:20:19] LucidFluid2: club house
[18052006 02:20:21] LucidFluid2: safe house
[18052006 02:20:37] Tarsorrhaphix: butt house
[18052006 02:20:39] Tarsorrhaphix: sap house
[18052006 02:20:41] LucidFluid2: fire house
[18052006 02:20:42] Tarsorrhaphix: whorehouse
[18052006 02:20:48] LucidFluid2: whore house
[18052006 02:20:52] LucidFluid2: crackhouse
[18052006 02:21:01] LucidFluid2: brick shithouse
[18052006 02:21:17] LucidFluid2: could call wolfeyes crackhouse?
[18052006 02:21:22] Tarsorrhaphix: when your mom sits around the house she really sits around the house
[18052006 02:21:41] LucidFluid2: daft punk is playing at my house
[18052006 02:21:43] Tarsorrhaphix: yes youo could
[18052006 02:21:52] Tarsorrhaphix: house of the rising sun
[18052006 02:21:55] Tarsorrhaphix: house of a thousand corpses
[18052006 02:22:03] Tarsorrhaphix: alice doesnt live here anymore… house…
[18052006 02:22:06] LucidFluid2: house of stone and light
[18052006 02:22:07] Tarsorrhaphix: house doesnt live here anymore
[18052006 02:22:09] LucidFluid2: house of sand and fog
[18052006 02:22:22] Tarsorrhaphix: house inspector
[18052006 02:22:46] Tarsorrhaphix: real estate baby chicken neck disappearance spectacular
[18052006 02:22:49] LucidFluid2: come into our HOUSE, wont you stay, I know the steak is cold, but it's wrapped in plastic
[18052006 02:22:58] Tarsorrhaphix: our HOUSE in the middle of our street
[18052006 02:23:02] Tarsorrhaphix: love shack house
[18052006 02:23:13] LucidFluid2: bird house
[18052006 02:23:20] Tarsorrhaphix: hen house
[18052006 02:23:24] Tarsorrhaphix: dog house
[18052006 02:23:42] Tarsorrhaphix: casa de los babys
[18052006 02:23:44] Tarsorrhaphix: maison
[18052006 02:23:50] Tarsorrhaphix: musique maison
[18052006 02:24:02] Tarsorrhaphix: HOUSE SALAD
[18052006 02:24:14] LucidFluid2: salad wave
[18052006 02:24:16] Tarsorrhaphix: house dressing
[18052006 02:24:18] Tarsorrhaphix: house special
[18052006 02:24:22] LucidFluid2: chanson maison
[18052006 02:24:23] Tarsorrhaphix: house rules
[18052006 02:24:30] Tarsorrhaphix: charles maison
[18052006 02:24:44] LucidFluid2: house the boss
[18052006 02:24:52] Tarsorrhaphix: look house talking 2
[18052006 02:24:58] LucidFluid2: house a cheesecake
[18052006 02:25:07] LucidFluid2: short circuit house
[18052006 02:25:07] Tarsorrhaphix: housefather
[18052006 02:25:21] LucidFluid2: all dogs go to house
[18052006 02:25:25] Tarsorrhaphix: the englishman who went up a hill and came down a house
[18052006 02:25:39] LucidFluid2: house on haunted hill
[18052006 02:25:41] Tarsorrhaphix: house harbor
[18052006 02:25:46] Tarsorrhaphix: gone in 60 houses
[18052006 02:25:57] LucidFluid2: 28 houses later
[18052006 02:26:03] LucidFluid2: the girl nextdoor
[18052006 02:26:03] Tarsorrhaphix: dawn of the house
[18052006 02:26:10] Tarsorrhaphix: land of the housing dead
[18052006 02:26:13] Tarsorrhaphix: house of the housing house
[18052006 02:26:25] Tarsorrhaphix: to house, thanks for everything, jewlie newmar
[18052006 02:26:38] LucidFluid2: gingerbread house
[18052006 02:26:41] Tarsorrhaphix: my house is your house
[18052006 02:26:45] LucidFluid2: igloo
[18052006 02:26:53] Tarsorrhaphix: deep wigwam
[18052006 02:26:53] LucidFluid2: pizza house
[18052006 02:27:03] LucidFluid2: long house
[18052006 02:27:12] Tarsorrhaphix: teepee
[18052006 02:27:17] Tarsorrhaphix: rickshaw
[18052006 02:27:22] Tarsorrhaphix: opium den
[18052006 02:27:26] Tarsorrhaphix: deep den
[18052006 02:27:30] Tarsorrhaphix: mom's house
[18052006 02:27:36] LucidFluid2: pizza den
[18052006 02:27:41] LucidFluid2: pizza igloo
[18052006 02:27:42] Tarsorrhaphix: pizza igloo
[18052006 02:27:44] LucidFluid2: LOL
[18052006 02:27:44] Tarsorrhaphix: LOL
[18052006 02:27:48] LucidFluid2: wtfOL
[18052006 02:27:49] LucidFluid2: ?"
[18052006 02:27:52] Tarsorrhaphix: HHAHAHAHAHA
[18052006 02:28:08] LucidFluid2: house o)))
[18052006 02:28:14] LucidFluid2: (whcih is us)
[18052006 02:28:21] LucidFluid2: wow… came full circle
[18052006 02:28:24] LucidFluid2: full house
[18052006 02:28:28] Tarsorrhaphix: NOASLKDFJALEIFJALEIIFJ
[18052006 02:28:30] Tarsorrhaphix: AHHAHAHAHHAHAHHA
[18052006 02:28:33] Tarsorrhaphix: FULL HOUSE
[18052006 02:28:40] LucidFluid2: hehehehehehheheh
[18052006 02:28:42] LucidFluid2: yeah really
[18052006 02:28:47] Tarsorrhaphix: ho)))))))use
[18052006 02:29:02] Tarsorrhaphix: when youre in my house you play by my rules
[18052006 02:29:08] Tarsorrhaphix: neighbors house
[18052006 02:29:11] Tarsorrhaphix: flophouse
[18052006 02:29:27] LucidFluid2: poor house
[18052006 02:29:36] LucidFluid2: meth lab
[18052006 02:29:56] Tarsorrhaphix: peewee's playhouse
[18052006 02:29:58] Tarsorrhaphix: house of wax
[18052006 02:30:00] Tarsorrhaphix: house of cards
[18052006 02:30:32] LucidFluid2: peewee
[18052006 02:30:34] LucidFluid2: LOL
[18052006 02:30:42] LucidFluid2: let's play house
[18052006 02:30:49] LucidFluid2: doll house
[18052006 02:30:59] LucidFluid2: mad house
[18052006 02:31:04] Tarsorrhaphix: tit house
[18052006 02:31:08] Tarsorrhaphix: cock house
[18052006 02:31:15] LucidFluid2: house on a rope
[18052006 02:31:21] Tarsorrhaphix: pope house
[18052006 02:31:29] Tarsorrhaphix: progressive vatican
[18052006 02:32:01] LucidFluid2: deep vatican
[18052006 02:32:04] LucidFluid2: acid vatican
[18052006 02:32:11] Tarsorrhaphix: acid igloo
[18052006 02:32:15] LucidFluid2: WW303D?
[18052006 02:32:25] Tarsorrhaphix: WW0)))))D
[18052006 02:32:29] LucidFluid2: that's a shirt
[18052006 02:32:31] Tarsorrhaphix: jesus is my co house
[18052006 02:32:47] Tarsorrhaphix: half way house
[18052006 02:33:00] Tarsorrhaphix: soup house
[18052006 02:33:07] Tarsorrhaphix: malibu dream house
[18052006 02:33:10] LucidFluid2: green house gases
[18052006 02:33:13] Tarsorrhaphix: houseboat
[18052006 02:33:16] LucidFluid2: green house effect
[18052006 02:33:25] LucidFluid2: boat house
[18052006 02:33:27] Tarsorrhaphix: progressive green house
[18052006 02:33:29] LucidFluid2: garage
[18052006 02:33:30] LucidFluid2: oh shit
[18052006 02:33:36] LucidFluid2: "garage"
[18052006 02:33:39] LucidFluid2: hehehe
[18052006 02:33:41] Tarsorrhaphix: storehouse
[18052006 02:33:42] Tarsorrhaphix: lol
[18052006 02:33:45] Tarsorrhaphix: garage house
[18052006 02:33:48] LucidFluid2: oo
[18052006 02:34:01] LucidFluid2: is lcd soundsystem garage house?
[18052006 02:34:07] Tarsorrhaphix: YES
[18052006 02:34:14] Tarsorrhaphix: lawnmower
[18052006 02:34:20] Tarsorrhaphix: toolshed
[18052006 02:34:31] LucidFluid2: lawnmowerman house
[18052006 02:34:38] Tarsorrhaphix: acid lawnmower
[18052006 02:34:43] LucidFluid2: toolshed hehehe… a perfect house
[18052006 02:34:58] Tarsorrhaphix: thihs land is my land thiis land is your house
[18052006 02:35:52] Tarsorrhaphix: john cage's house
[18052006 02:35:58] Tarsorrhaphix: john cage's mom's deep acid house
[18052006 02:36:04] Tarsorrhaphix: 0)))))))'33"
[18052006 02:36:33] Tarsorrhaphix: 8==========D'33"

Free 411 – 1-800-FREE411 – Free directory assistance for your home and cell phone.
"Dial 1-800-FREE411 for free directory assistance. You may hear a short relevant offer while we're looking up your number…"

a fine idea… a similar one I had replaces the ring with ads. im not talking about ringtone but the way they have that ringback service where the ring is replaced by music… put ads there and have them pay your phone bill…

altho.. your phone bill would be very low… because… no one would call you…

again tho… not ads for ringtones… but like.. when u call someone… and while you're waiting for them to pick up… the ringing you hear in the phone before they answer… that's what im talking about…. having ads there

ex: u call me and u hear-

dial tone

the dialing sounds as u dial my number

instead of you hearing ringing next… you hear ads until I answer or it goes to voiemail

thx 4 the fwd mom… 

fuck these folks for thinking of this first… it looks like the best scam of all!

 

it's like.. .scamming.. .on the next level… and even if it's honest… the potential for doing this scammily… is amazing… this could totally be a gateway scam for a whole railroad of brooklyn bridges

 

 

Realistic Reviews of Home Businesses
"This is where the real money is.

Pay-per-click programs are the most powerful we've seen for making money on the Internet. This is referred to as Internet Marketing. You may have heard of some of these programs (the Rich Jerk is the most well-known). Each of the websites below show you how to make the Internet work hard for you, even while you're away on vacation. The profit potential is enormous and is well worth the investment in any of these programs. Each website offers a core of the same basic material, but each one also has a different specialty and expertise."

 

 

the problem i see is that their audience has to be jaded morons that know what this service is refering to and has probably had some bad experience with that industry… or semi-informed/curious skeptics…

 

the skeptics still won't enroll…

 

those burned are skeptical

 

those not burned are successful and don't need this…

 

and no one else knows or cares about wtf they're talking about…  

 

so nevermind… it's a dumb idea

 

nice try tho 

 

could this be my calling?? blogging about how ridiculous some spam is?

 

no… but someone should.. are there spam-watch blogs? that discuss the greater social implications of the spamiverse? the cultural phenomenology of the spam?

Techdirt: Don't Forget To Read The New Disclaimer For The Internet
"Yesterday, Rob Hyndman noticed an impressive disclaimer for a rock preserve, noting that he wanted to include similar language in future contracts. Lawyer David Canton couldn't resist and used the disclaimer as a model for a wonderful new disclaimer for the internet that we agree should be a must read for all internet users:

'Business is unpredictable and unsafe. The Internet is dangerous. Many blogs have been written about these dangers, and there's no way we can list them all here. Read the blogs. The Internet is covered in slippery slopes with loose, slippery and unpredictable footing. The RIAA can make matters worse. Patent trolls are everywhere. You may fall, be spammed or suffer a DOS attack. There are hidden viruses and worms. You could break your computer. There is wild code, which may be vicious, poisonous or carriers of dread malware. These include viruses and worms. E-mail can be poisonous as well. We don't do anything to protect you from any of this. We do not inspect, supervise or maintain the Internet, blogosphere, ISP’s or other features, natural or otherwise.' "

I should write something similar for anyone seeking emotional involvement with me… to this point I've apparently been unclear… and that's not fair I guess 

watch this space for that…………. (or offer suggestions b4 i get to it)